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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28466601">now they’re painting on my skin</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/martinblackwood/pseuds/martinblackwood'>martinblackwood</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Apex Legends (Video Games)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Canon Compliant, Crypto | Park Tae Joon &amp; Wattson | Natalie Paquette Are Best Friends, Developing Friendships, Extended Scene, Forgiveness, Gen, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Trans Crypto | Park Tae Joon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:34:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,634</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28466601</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/martinblackwood/pseuds/martinblackwood</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>“But you know who I am. And you told me all of this anyway.” She laughed a bit and smiled at him. “That wasn’t very smart. I don’t think Crypto would do that. So whoever you are…” She looked him up and down. </em>
</p><p>  <em>She looked as if she was considering her words. Like she didn’t know if she should continue. He gave her a silent, “Go ahead.”</em></p><p>  <em>“You’re more than just Crypto. I think I could trust you, now that I know someone in there trusts me. So…” Natalie held out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, whoever you are.”</em></p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Crypto | Park Tae Joon &amp; Wattson | Natalie Paquette</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>now they’re painting on my skin</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>so about that <a href="https://twitter.com/PlayApex/status/1344757723749961729">new lore drop</a>! (starts weeping and sobbing) i love these two so much theyre so best friends. dont touch this if you ship them uhh ya dats it, this is just me writing out the dialogue how i saw it happening in my brain :-) happy new year btw</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> Crypto said, with a shaky breath, “Wattson. I… I swear. I didn’t do it. You can trust me.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You say so. But, really, I don’t know you. How can I trust a stranger?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> They walked in silence for a long time after that. Crypto walked up to Wattson, crouching behind a pillar and reloading her gun. “I thought about what you said, and I have something to tell you. But not here.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> She looked up at him with raised eyebrows. “Oh! Well… all right. After the match?” </em>
</p>
<hr/><p>Natalie made her way to Crypto’s apartment with her nodes in her pockets and her arms wrapped around herself. Her heart was racing. What could he possibly have to tell her that he didn’t already? He had never seemed like a threat, but she didn’t <em> know </em>him. Talking to Dr. Nox about it made her realise that. She shook her head and sighed as she approached the door, standing at it for a moment. She didn’t have to open it. She could walk away, go back to her own place and have a nice dinner then just go to sleep. Maybe text Renee for a while. </p><p>She raised her hand and put it on the doorknob. It opened without her even twisting. Crypto was sitting on his bed, picking at the skin around his nails and bouncing his leg nervously. He looked up at him and gave her a look she couldn’t place. </p><p>Relief. </p><p>He was relieved that she came, that his panic attacks all night hadn’t been for nothing, that she didn’t… <em> completely </em>hate him. He smiled a little. “Thank you for coming. I guess you can trust me a little.” </p><p>She shook her head and jangled her pocket as she sat at his desk, swiveling the chair around to face him. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, Crypto,” she said sharply, “I have my nodes. You’d be surprised what I can do with them.” </p><p>He’d seen it before. <em> Felt </em>it, the burn and the crackle under armour that they could shred into. He shuddered, then smiled to himself again. “You could have said shocked instead of surprised.” He chuckled and looked up at her, only to see her eyebrows furrowed and her eyes hard. </p><p>“Yes. I could have.” She crossed her arms and pulled her legs up to cross them under herself. “So, what is it you want to say to me?”</p><p>The panic in his chest started to rise again. The base of his throat felt tight, like something was stuck there and being pulled in both directions. His heart was racing, his hands trembling. He pressed on his index finger with his thumb hard enough to crack the knuckle without even trying. “I… I thought about what you said, and you’re right. You can’t trust someone you don’t know. So… I—I  want you to know… I’m… my name is... I… I am—” He was cut off by her giggle. She was <em> laughing </em> at him. It felt like he had a bomb in his chest just <em> waiting </em>to explode, and she was laughing. “I’m glad this is amusing to you!”</p><p>She shook her head and waved her hand. “It isn’t, I swear. But it can’t be that bad! I’ve been around the arena since I was very young, I’ve met a lot of people! Not all of them good…” she frowned for a moment, then her face picked up again, “I don’t think you could say anything that could shock me.”</p><p>He nodded and took a deep breath. Natalie leaned forward a bit. “My name… is not Hyeon Kim. I am not from Solace.” She didn’t seem phased, as if that was something she had known or at the very least expected. </p><p>“All right. Then what is your name?” He bit the inside of his lip and started picking at his skin again. She frowned. “You’re really that afraid?”</p><p>Out of nowhere, H.A.C.K. came flying out of its case and he went tense. “I’m not afraid!” he snapped, “But I’m not an idiot! There are people after me!”</p><p>Natalie seemed unphased. “But the Syndicate will protect you! They want you to compete, so they will keep you safe! Outside the ring, anyway…” He gave her a pained look. “What?”</p><p>“The person after me…” he swallowed. Was he really willing to tell her so much? Why did he trust <em> her, </em> of all people? Was Bloodhound, someone possibly more secretive himself, not more trustworthy? He could feel it, though. She was <em> so much </em>like Mila, it was almost physically painful. In her smile, her words, the way she carried herself. He closed his eyes. “The person after me is part of the Syndicate.”</p><p>She leaned forward, elbows digging into her knees and hand on her chin. “What did you d—”</p><p><em> “NOTHING!” </em> His ears went hot and his hands started to tremble again. “I did <em> nothing! </em> Exactly like I was supposed to! And <em> everything </em> still went <em> wrong!” </em>He slumped down and dug his hands into his eyes until the pitch black started to speckle with white and purple dots. H.A.C.K. beeped and went back to its case to rest. He said, quietly, tears forming, “Sorry.”</p><p>Natalie shook her head. “No, it’s all right. Go on.”</p><p>He nodded slowly and uncovered his eyes. “I… before I joined the Games, I worked for the Syndicate. So did my sister. One day, we found something we shouldn’t have.” He brought his thumb up to his lips to gnaw at the skin around his nails. Picking wasn’t easing anything anymore. “She tried to steal it, they found out, she went missing, and they… framed me for her murder.”</p><p>Natalie’s hand flew to her mouth. “Oh, that’s <em> terrible! </em>Did you find out what happened to her?” </p><p>He stood then, clenching his fists together and unclenching them. He began to pace around the small room, fingertips tapping together as he thought out his words. “She found me, maybe. Someone contacted me, on King’s Canyon. It might be her, or someone impersonating her. I…” he sighed and sat back down, <em> “molla. </em> But if it is... she might be able to help me.” He found a loose string on the bottom hem of his shirt and pulled at it. Natalie tilted her head encouragingly. “Because until I have answers… until I can clear my name, I don’t have one. I’m just Crypto.”</p><p>“But you <em> do </em>have a name. You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”</p><p>He shook his head. “That’s not it. Once someone has your name…” he pulled at the string harder, “they have everything. I’m used to being careful.”</p><p>“You’ve told me <em> so much, </em>though. Why?”</p><p>She was asking the same thing he’d been asking himself for months. He couldn’t tell her why, because he barely understood himself. He’d never been able to tell anyone, no matter how much they pressed. “I… enjoyed working with you.” It wasn’t a lie. He meant it, he had <em> loved </em> working with her. He felt free, and <em> safe. </em>“You seem honest,” he continued. “Trustworthy. I hope.”</p><p>“You… you know my father and I work for the Syndicate, don’t you? You know that I owe so much to them?” He didn’t get to nod before she kept going. “Of course, you know everything about everyone. But when Dr. Caustic said you didn’t cross Loba, I realised I don’t know anything about you. You didn’t want me to.” Her face hardened and a cross between anger and concern filled her face as she said, “You treated me like an <em> enemy!” </em> She took a deep breath. “But you know who I am. And you told me all of this anyway.” She laughed a bit and smiled at him. “That wasn’t very smart. I don’t think Crypto would do that. So whoever you are…” She looked him up and down. </p><p>She looked as if she was considering her words. Like she didn’t know if she should continue. He gave her a silent, “Go ahead.”</p><p>“You’re more than just Crypto. I think I could trust you, now that I know someone in there trusts me. So…” Natalie held out her hand. “It’s nice to meet you, whoever you are.”</p><p>He felt like he could die then and there. He had spent so long crafting his identity so many times over. Coming out as trans, telling people his new name, having to create <em> multiple </em> new ones because of a secret he should have kept to protect his sister… he didn’t know if he could stand another new one if she gave out his name. His <em> real </em> name, the one he had picked himself and been so proud of for so long. He bit the inside of his lip and took a deep breath. There was no reason to not trust her. She had been nothing but kind to him, she had <em> never </em>told anyone about anything that was shared between them. </p><p>Natalie Paquette was someone to be trusted.</p><p>“It’s… Tae-joon Park.”</p><p>It was like a boulder had been lifted off of his soul. </p><p>Tae-joon. His name was Tae-joon, and it was <em> okay. </em>Natalie was smiling like somebody had plucked stars out of the sky just for her. </p><p>“Nice to meet you, Tae-joon. Your secret is safe with me. And I hope you don’t mind inducting me into your circle of friends.” She giggled, and Tae-joon took her hand, carefully.</p><p>He blinked back tears as he said, “Nice to meet you too, Natalie.” He let out a noise of surprise as she stood and pulled him into a hug. He slowly wrapped his arms around her shoulders and she smiled. </p><p>Natalie Paquette was Tae-joon Park’s best friend, and there was nothing that anybody in the Outlands could do to ruin that feeling for him.</p>
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